Have you noticed how your business has evolved over the years? If I look at mine, the clients I attract are different, the problems I help with are different, and the way I view it is different. The other part of my business that has changed along the way are the boundaries I hold.
As a society, we often see rules as a negative thing, like they would hinder the relationship, but actually rules, boundaries, or agreements (however you want to view them) allow the relationship to flourish, grow, and strengthen.
Sometimes the agreements you have become outdated and you need to take a step back to review. It can come as a surprise: something may happen and you realise that you need to add in a new boundary that’s not there at the moment. Or you can see that something just isn’t working for you.
I realised recently that now I’m moving 200 miles back to Norwich, I’ll see more clients and more in-person clients. Some of the agreements I had with previous clients no longer work for me. I decided to take a step back and look at which agreements I need to reset so things feel aligned again.
Welcome to today’s blog: a practical reflection. Boundaries aren’t set in stone and sometimes they need updating.
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Why Boundaries Need a Reset
In every relationship you need boundaries. They’re there to allow the relationship to flourish but also to protect you. When you create them, you tell yourself that you are important and you want the best for yourself and the relationship you’re building. Although they can be hard to put in place (some relationships easier than others), without them trouble is ahead.
Creating rules also tells you that you’re ready to protect your time and energy and make the relationship (and your life) work for you.
I once had a client who paid three invoices late, and I wasn’t particularly worried about them paying because I knew they would eventually. The impact was actually the frustration of having to keep chasing and having the same conversation. Then they became confused about why so many invoices had built up close together.
You may be screaming at the computer, why didn’t you get them to pay before you started the sessions? I do, I have that rule in my business for new clients. But when you have clients who’ve been with you for years, sometimes your boundaries become a bit blurry.
Experiences like this are constant reminders that some of my old boundaries have gone soft and I’ve taken my foot off the pedal. After all, implementing them is tough and takes effort on your part.
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Practical Example of a Reset
Use your frustrations to see where it’s not working right now in your business.
After the situation with my client, I reset and created a system for repeated personal training clients.
I now tell them one week in advance that I’m going to invoice for the following week. I then issue the invoice stating the start date of the next set of sessions.
Creating this agreement wasn’t really about the money (although it matters). It was about looking after my energy. You only have so much energy in a day, where and how are you willing to spend it? Where can you reduce unnecessary stress?
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The Reflection Process
Walk with me through this process and see where your business could do with a reset.
Step back like an outsider
“What situations in my business don’t work for me right now?”
This could be late payments, over-delivering, working late. Look at where you’re frustrated or annoyed. Do the same situations keep coming up? Even if it’s just a little niggle, it’s worth exploring.
Spot what is working
Which rules or agreements are protecting your energy?
Which clients feel aligned and easy to work with?
You can use this to take forward and apply with new clients, or maybe existing clients where you don’t currently have the same agreement.
Check for gaps
Are you failing to implement a boundary you already have?
Or do you need to create a new rule entirely?
Are you constantly letting the same clients get away with a particular behaviour that is damaging your business, your time, or your energy? Can you see how resentment may be building and impacting your future relationship with them?
Review client by client
What’s not working with this client?
What is working that could be replicated elsewhere?
Review each client individually. You can wait until your next interaction with them and jot down any thoughts or feelings that come up.
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The Bigger Picture
As you grow and your business evolves, so do your boundaries. Maybe there’s something you used to tolerate, but now that your business has grown, you can see the negative impact. What worked at the beginning might not work now.
When I first started my business at 23, a lot was different. I was single with all the time in the world. I’d start at 6:30am and not finish until 9pm. Now, juggling family life, I don’t want to do that anymore, so my calendar has to work for me.
Having a reset isn’t about being rigid or strict. It’s about looking after yourself, your relationships, and your business so they all thrive.
And remember, whether you call them boundaries, rules, or agreements, they’re all serving the same role: creating clarity, reducing stress, and making sure you and your clients can work together in a way that feels good on both sides.
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